Never Date an Egyptologist
by John David Muth

This is grand prize for third date.
Slowly, I enter
relishing the warmth
as it permeates.
My weight settles:
a sinking ship
completing its watery descent.

Face to face
she is deep in thought
tells me ancient Egyptian women
inserted crocodile dung
into their vaginal canals
in order to prevent pregnancy

and somewhere between the words
dung and pregnancy
I melt like an ice cube
kissed by a blowtorch.

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